From Wishful Thinking to Better Daily Actions

I had some nice feedback on last week’s newsletter topic of not setting New Year’s resolutions and goals and instead to build better habits. Considering that 80% of New Year’s resolutions fail by February, and many by the 2nd Friday of January (also known as National Quitters Day!), it is important to dig a little deeper into why this is a vital concept and create something that will make a lasting impact on your life.

WHY RESOLUTIONS FAIL: One of the things to consider is why resolutions fail. Often times, we are overly ambitious with our goals…for example, saying we are going to lose 30 pounds and when we don’t lose weight right away, we get discouraged and give up. Other resolutions are too vague and keep us from being able to focus on the details needed to succeed. Other resolutions give you an “all or nothing” mindset where even if you make progress but don’t reach a set number, you are set up for failure. The more specific we can be the better!

EXAMPLES OF HABIT-BASED GOALS: Some of the feedback I received last week asked about more examples of habit-based goals. Here are a couple: instead of “lose 30 pounds”, make it a habit you can follow through with-like “drink a glass of water before every meal and no snack after 6:00.” Another example would be to replace “be more organized” with “spend 5 minutes planning my day each day when I wake up.” A final example would be instead of saying “I want to spend more time with family,” use “my family will have dinner together at least times per week.” I hope these examples are helpful as you think through habits you would like to build.

STEPS TO BUILDING SUSTAINABLE HABITS: We talked last week about the book Atomic Habits, and we shared a number of great ideas from there to build your habits. If you have not gotten started yet with building new year’s habits, here are some additional ideas on getting off to a successful start:

• Start small: don’t try to do too much too fast. Set up something that is achievable and you can always increase your numbers as you go.

• Attach new habits to existing routines-what James Clear calls habit stacking. Combining habits will always push us to complete the tasks we set up.

• Track your progress-what we write down, we do. Use an app if one is available and you are a technical person. Using a daily journal or even a simple checklist helps keep us accountable, which is huge!

• Celebrate wins-acknowledging milestones keep us motivated and wanting to do more.

AVOIDING BURNOUT: Another question that came up through feedback was how to avoid burnout when establishing new habits and routines. Here are a few ideas on avoiding this common trap:

• Embrace Flexibility

  • Understand that missing a day doesn’t mean failure. Allow room for adaptation and imperfection in your habit-building process.

  • Plan for "off days" where a modified version of the habit is acceptable, like a shorter workout or writing one sentence instead of a full page.

• Make Habits Enjoyable

  • Pair a challenging habit with something you love, like listening to a podcast during a workout.

  • Choose habits that align with your personal interests or values to increase motivation.

• Set Realistic Expectations

  • Start with achievable goals to build confidence, like meditating for two minutes instead of 20.

  • Allow yourself to adjust the habit if it proves too demanding or doesn’t fit your routine.

• Focus on Progress Over Perfection

  • Celebrate small wins, like sticking to a habit three days in a week instead of all seven.

  • Track incremental progress, such as increasing the duration or intensity of the habit over time.

I appreciate those of you who reached out with questions or ideas as building positive habits is such an important topic at this time of the year and putting a proper system in place and following through on a commitment to improvement, it can have a huge impact on your life.

As I asked last week: what habits do you want to build for the future to better your life? What impact will this have on you, your family, and your friends? Think it through, write it down, and start somewhere! Reach out for any support you need and I would love to help you in your journey so fill me in on your progress or concerns any time! Have a great week!

Coach K