Perspective Matters

I spent a couple of days last week at the IGHSAU girls state basketball tournament. It was a very enjoyable time with plenty of great action and a chance to connect with many coaches from throughout the state. There were a number of close games and plenty of pressure situations for the teams and coaches involved.

If you followed any of the results, you probably saw the ending of the Dallas Center-Grimes and Norwalk state semifinal game from Thursday. The Norwalk coach has been a coaching friend for many years and one of DC-G’s best players was one of my players at Mason City before moving with her family 3 years ago so the game had special interest to me.

The final moments of the game were crazy.-DC-G trailed by 6 with 46 seconds left and scored eight points in about 20 seconds, stealing two inbounds passes and flipping what looked like a sure Norwalk win into a stunning comeback. There was a technical involved as well because of a mistake by the scorer’s table thinking there was a lack of time outs but that is another story….

Within minutes of the game ending, the video clip of the ending was everywhere. It even ended up on the ABC nightly news show. There was a lot of credit given rightfully to DC-G for the plays they made but just as quickly, the criticism of Norwalk started online. People questioned the player who threw the inbounds passes. Others questioned the coaching decisions he should have made . Social media immediately filled up with opinions, sarcasm, and harsh judgment.

All of this was based on a 20-second video. Judgments were passed on a short snippet of a game and not on the whole story of what happened. Unfortunately, that’s the challenge with “viral” moments.

They sometimes show the mistake, but not the pressure that the players and coaches are under.They show the outcome, but not the preparation and everything else that went into the results. They show the ending, but not the entire story.

Moments like that always make me think back to a state semifinal game I coached years ago. We lost a very tough game after leading by a nice margin after the 3rd quarter, and afterward one of our players publicly questioned my coaching decisions late in the game. In the moment, it would have been easy to defend myself or push back.

Instead, I tried to take the high road.I reminded myself of something important: she was a young person trying to process a painful loss on one of the biggest stages of her life. We all know that emotions run high in those moments. Perspective sometimes takes time and making snap judgements don’t work very well.

That player went on to have a great college career. Over the years we stayed in touch and communicated often. Today we have a great relationship and I am incredibly proud of the young women she is now. I often wonder how things would be if I had reacted differently. I feel like time and maturity have a way of bringing clarity often times and wish others would slow down before passing judgment and expressing opinions on stressful situations that arise.

That’s why I always hesitate when I see people rush to judgment over a short clip. When we watch something online or hear about an event from someone else, we see a tiny part of a much bigger story.

When it comes to watching a sporting event or reacting to something we see about a game online, we don’t see the hours of preparation put in by everyone involved. We don’t see the conversations between coaches and players. We don’t see the pressure of playing and coaching in front of thousands of people with a season on the line. And we certainly don’t see everything that led up to that moment.

Yet it only takes a few seconds for people to decide what should have happened.

I have always thought that sports have always been a great teacher of life lessons. One of the most important is this: Assume best intentions.

Most coaches are trying to do what they believe is best for their players. Most players are trying to make the best decision they can in a high-pressure moment. No one walks onto the court/field hoping things will go wrong.

So when we watch high school games, a reminder that the players in that game are high school athletes. They’re learning, growing, competing, and doing the best they can in the moment. Years from now, they’ll remember that game. and hopefully they remember the competition, the atmosphere, and the experience of playing in a state tournament game and not the criticism from thousands of people who watched a 20-second clip and assumed they knew the whole story.

I fear for the future of the Norwalk player who had the turnovers and has faced a lot of ridicule for how the game ended. She had a great game up till then but those who watched only the 20 second clip and don’t know the situation have already blamed her for the loss. What a huge burden to bear and hopefully her family and support system around her will help her understand it was a game, not the most important thing in life, and that teams win and lose games together, not because of a single or even a couple of plays. Humans are not perfect and in games, and in life, none of us will go through life “error free”.

So before we rush to comment, criticize, or judge, it might be worth asking ourselves one simple question:

Do I really know the whole story?

Most of the time, the answer is no.

And when that’s the case, in sports, and in life, showing a little grace and understanding can go a long way.

Have a great week!

Coach K